And the Flowers Showered

Subhuti

Buddha had thousands of disciples. Subhuti was just one of them, nothing special about him. Really nobody knows much about Subhuti, this is the only story about him. There were great disciples, well known, famous -- great scholars, princes. They had big kingdoms, and when they left them and renounced and became disciples of Buddha, they had a name around them. But flowers didn't shower on them. Flowers chose this Subhuti who was just one of the disciples, nothing special about him.

Only then do flowers shower; otherwise you also can become special around a buddha -- and you can miss! You can feel egoistic about being near a buddha too, you can create a hierarchy; you can say, 'I am not an ordinary disciple, I am something special. I am just next to Buddha. Others are just ordinary, a crowd, but I am not a crowd; I have a name, an identity of my own. Even before I came to Buddha I was somebody' -- and they remain somebody.

Sariputta came to Buddha. When he came it was with five hundred disciples of his own. He was a master -- of course an unenlightened master, knowing nothing, and still feeling that he knew because he was a great scholar. He knew all the scriptures. He was born a brahmin and a very talented one, a genius. From his very childhood he was known for his great memory -- he could memorize anything. Only once he had to read a scripture, and it was already memorized. He was known all over the country; when he came to Buddha he was somebody. That somebodiness became the barrier.

These gods seem to be very irrational -- they have chosen a disciple, Subhuti, who was just one in the crowd, nothing special about him. These gods seem to be crazy! They should have chosen Sariputta, he was the man to be chosen. But they have not chosen him. They have not chosen Ananda, Buddha's cousin-brother, Buddha's shadow continuously for forty years -- for forty years, not for a single moment was he away from Buddha. He slept in the same room; he moved with Buddha, continuously by his side. He was the most well known person. All the stories that Buddha told he starts by telling them to Ananda. He says, 'Ananda, it happened this way'; 'Ananda, once it happened.' 'Ananda' and 'Ananda' and 'Ananda' -- he goes on repeating his name. But these gods are crazy, they have chosen Subhuti -- a nobody!

Remember, only nobodies are chosen -- because if you are somebody in this world you are nobody in the other world. If here you are a nobody, you become somebody in the other world. Values differ. Here, gross things are valued; there, subtle things are valued. And the most subtle, the subtlest, is NOT TO BE. Subhuti lived in the crowd -- nobody even knew his name -- and when this news came that flowers were showering on Subhuti everybody wondered, 'Who is this Subhuti? We never heard about him. Has it happened by some accident? Have the gods chosen him wrongly?' -- because there were many who were higher in the hierarchy. Subhuti must have been the last. This is the only story about Subhuti.

Try to understand it well. When you are near a great master be a nobody. Gods are crazy, they will chose you only when you are not. And if you try to be, the more you succeed in being somebody, the more you will miss. This is what we are doing in the world and this we start doing around a buddha also. You crave for riches. Why? -- because with riches you become someone. You crave for prestige and power. Why? -- because with power and prestige you are not ordinary. You crave for learning, scholarship, knowledge. Why? -- because with knowledge you have something to be proud of.

But gods will not chose you that way. They have their own way of choosing. If you are yourself beating your drum too much, there is no need for gods to shower flowers on you -- you are throwing flowers upon yourself; there is no need. When you stop being proud about anything suddenly the whole existence starts being proud of you. Jesus says, 'Those who are first in this world will be the last in the kingdom of my God, and those who are last will be the first.'

It happened once that a very rich man died on the same day a beggar in the town also died. The name of the beggar was Lazarus. The rich man went directly to hell and Lazarus directly to heaven. The rich man looked up and saw Lazarus sitting near God, and he cried to heaven, 'It seems that something has gone wrong. I should be there and this beggar Lazarus should be here!'

God laughed and he said, 'Those who are last shall become the first, and those who are first shall become the last. You have enjoyed being first enough, now let Lazarus enjoy a little.'

And the rich man was feeling very hot -- of course in hell you don't have any air-conditioning yet -- burning hot. He was feeling very thirsty and there was no water. So he again cried and said, 'God, please at least send Lazarus with a little water, I am feeling very thirsty.'

And God said, 'Lazarus was thirsty many times, nearly dying at your door, and you never gave him anything. He was dying, hungry at your door and there was a feast every day, and many were invited, but he was always chased away from the door by your servants because guests were coming, powerful guests, politicians, diplomats, rich men, and a beggar standing there would look awkward. Your servants chased him away and he was hungry, and the people who were invited were not hungry. You never looked at Lazarus. Now it is impossible.'

And it is said Lazarus laughed.
This became a deep story for many many Christian mystics to ponder over. It became just like a zen koan, and in monasteries Christian mystics have been asking again and again why Lazarus laughed.

He laughed at the absurdity of things. He never knew that a nobody like Lazarus -- a leper, a beggar, would ever enter heaven. He could never believe that this had happened. And he could not believe the other thing either -- that a rich man, the richest in the town, should go to hell. He laughed.

And Lazarus still laughs. And he will laugh when you die also: if you are a somebody he will laugh, because you will be thrown out. If you are nobody, just ordinary, he will laugh because you will be received.

In this world, because egos exist, all valuations belong to the ego. In the other world, the other dimension, valuation belongs to egolessness. Hence Buddha's emphasis on no-selfness -- ANATTA. He said, 'Don't even believe "I am a soul" because that too can become a subtle ego. Don't say "AHAM BRAHMASMI -- I am Brahma, I am the ultimate self." Don't say even that, because the I is very tricky. It can deceive you. It HAS deceived you for many many lives. It can go on deceiving you. Simply say "I am not" and remain in that NOTNESS, remain in that nothingness -- become empty of the self.'

One has to get rid of the self. Once the self is thrown away, nothing is lacking. You start overflowing and blossoms start falling on you.

Subhuti was one of Buddha's disciples. He was able to understand the potency of emptiness.
He was just one of many, that's why he was able to understand the potency of emptiness. Nobody talked about him, nobody knew about him. He walked with, he followed Buddha on many many paths in his travels. Nobody knew that he was also there; if he had died nobody would have become aware. If he had escaped nobody would have known, because nobody ever knew that Subhuti was there. He knew, by and by, being nobody, he knew THE POTENCY OF EMPTINESS.

What is the meaning of it? ... Because the more he became a nonentity, the more he felt that Buddha was coming closer to him. Nobody else was aware, but Buddha was aware. Everybody wondered when these flowers showered on him, but it was not a surprise to Buddha. When it was reported to him that something had happened to Subhuti, Buddha said, 'I was waiting. Any moment it was going to happen, because he has erased himself so much; any day it was going to happen. There is no surprise in it for me.